Tuesday, June 28, 2011

The "Marriage" Talk

Surprisingly, Trav used to be so scared of the word “marriage” so we tried not to mention it (except I would once in a while to see if he was on the same page as me). Now, he's excited (well I can't say he's beyond thrilled) to hear about the wedding talk too. But then again, there’s not very much, just because we’re  still not sure about a date and nor what state we’re going to have it in! (Except I did just get my first price estimation).We are much more enjoying the part just being “engaged”.  
However, my friend Ashley, made me think when she asked something like, “Is there anything that scares you about marriage?” That’s not a question that I have been asked before, and rightfully, it should be. This is because so many people jump into the whole marriage scene without even thinking about it.  It’s much more than fun and games.
So my major concerns:
1.) Getting a divorce. It’s so common nowadays.
2.) Trav getting sick of me. I mean we’re spending a WHOLE lifetime together – we have to take the bad with the good.
3.) Our future kids. I was definitively raised more strictly than my other friends. Although, I don’t want to be as strict as my parents were  (I’m not complaining because I think I was raised pretty darn good), I can imagine myself as the “mean” parent, while Trav will probably be the parent who sees more things ideally than I would.
4.) Money issues.  Money is one of leading reasons of getting a divorce. Although I feel like we are perfectly fine right now – we have not thrown kids and other things in the mix yet.
While talking to Ashley while her husband and Travis were golfing, she gave me some really good advice that I will use for the rest of my life.
1.) Both should go into the marriage knowing that divorce is not an option.  (I personally say there are a few exceptions such as: abuse, any kind of drug/drinking “ism”, or cheating).  Trav and I both don’t want this for us or for our kids. Marriage is forever, not something to get out of when you’re having a difficult time. When that happens; seek counseling, do anything in your will power to fix it. You fell in love with that person for a reason, married that person because that person was the only person you wanted for your lifetime, and etc.
2.) Whatever you do together, think of it as your asset. For example, if you eat together, wake up together, go to bed together, play golf together, etc.  Those couples who play together, are more likely to stay together.
3.) Make coming home fun. Once you lose that, you lose respect for each other. Home should be a place of enjoyment, NOT fighting/degrading/or resentment.  Make the time that you guys have with each other, the most. Do the little things too: be silly, make voices, sing together, play practical jokes on each other, etc.
What is some really good wedding advice/engagement advice that you have lived by?

Monday, June 20, 2011

Wedding Questions

Thank you all you lovlies out there for the congrats!! We couldn't be more excited! And I can't wait to share all my wedding planning adventures with you. But I don't want to become too obsessed, so let me know if I am or not.

Becoming a newly engaged couple, there are many questions that pop up, but the two main ones so far have been,

"Have you set a date yet?"

Friends,  we just got engaged. So no. LOL. This is also because 1.) We don't know where we are going to have it. Everyone is back from Indiana - but we really don't want to have it in Indiana. We would like a small wedding, and I don't believe that would happen in Indiana. We could set the location in WI where we got engaged - but it may be a little difficult to book cabins or whatnot. Or we could have it in Arizona - but I would hate for all the guests to purchase plane tickets & also then hotel rooms. That's a lot of money just for a weekend, when instead if we have it in WI, they can pay the same around the same amount and get a cabin connected to a lake for a week. 2.) Trav wants to go back to school. So he has been applying for schools. He has an interview soon (cross your fingers!) but the program is a two and a half years! When we do get married we would like to take off at least 2 weeks, and he wouldn't be able to do that with school. So we may have to wait until after he graduates. But, one step at a time. 3.) Planning a wedding is stressful! I got my first bridal magazine & uh, the stress! There are so many things that you have to do, and I'm just not completely ready for the stress. We want a cheap wedding, NOT a crazy out of this world wedding that we're going to have to pay off for years to come.

"Were you surprised?"

Yes, but at the same time, I knew something was going on. One day, I came home early and Trav wasn't home. He had my phone since he took me out earlier for lunch. When he came home, he was acting different, and all in smiles. I asked him what he was doing, and he told me he was looking at bikes. However, he didn't say anything else, and because thinking that it was a ring, I laughed and didn't mention anything else.

BUT, about a week ago, while I was cleaning I found a piece of paper that stated he withdrew money from his bank account. I confronted him and he said, "I might have put some money to hold a bike for 30 days." I got upset and started questioning why he would have done such a thing without confronting me.  We always discuss money matters. Trav laughed and said, "You didn't even ask me anything about the bike". At this time, I didn't really want to know.

But I still had an itching that something might have been up. So, I called my mom of course! Before we left for the trip Trav told me that he probably wasn't going to do anything about the bike and that he would get his money back when we got back from vacation and from thereon, he didn't want to talk about it.

When Friday rolled around, my dad came to pick me up from the airport. He told me that Trav stopped by early. But, he didn't say anything about the obvious.

It was Saturday evening, and Trav told me that, "If I'm a little mushy all around you. Let me know!" I looked at him dumbfounded and asked, "And why would you do that?" Little did I know!

Monday rolled around, and Trav didn't act any different than normal. Then he popped the question, and somewhere in between I think I said yes. LOL.

Now... let's get this show on the road!




Sunday, June 19, 2011

We're Engaged!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Squeals with excitement*

On Monday, June 13th, 2011....
.
..
...
It was a beautiful, gorgeous, sunny day at the North Woods. (His mom's family goes every year and this time, I was able to go) Since it was such a lovely day, we found a lovely little place off the lake that would be a great picnic spot.

We had our picnic (which consisted of BLTs and his grandma's mac and pea's), but saved dessert for later.

then we played in the water

It was soon time for dessert. As we were heading back to the picnic spot I metioned, "I only have one more bar left on the camera." Trav (without hestiation) blurted out, "Well turn it off then!" At this time, I didn't think anything of it, so I went back to the picnic spot and put the camera down. Appantely, I started cleaning up our picnic spot a little so we could have dessert. Trav asked me to "come here" and when I turned around Trav was like this:

***acting out the proposal***
Trav making fun of me

To be completely honest, I was in complete shock and don't remember exactly what he said because my mind was racing. Although I don't remember his exact words because my mind was racing with excitement:

"Ashley Lynn (last name) the last two years have been the best of his life... he wanted to grow old with me, have kids with me... and then lastly, asked me to be his queen." (There was a lot more stuff, but.... I don't remember because I was so excited I couldn't even think straight).

It was uber romantic and I still am so excited that Trav loves me so much that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. And of course I jumped on him and asked, "You want to marry me??!!! Even if we don't have athletic kids?" I'm not even sure if I said yes, but it was implied. LOL.

There were even two butterflies that were flying around us (which I thought was from heaven above):


And of course some of our newly engaged photos:


When I got home on Saturday (Trav isn't coming home until later this week) and much to my surprise, thanks to Ryan and Kara, I found this:



Can you believe it???!!! I still can't - even with the bridal magazines, my ring, being able to say " fiancĂ© " and everything else.  I can't believe I get to marry the my prince charming.




North Woods

Every year, Trav's mom side of the family (aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents) takes a trip up to WI. This year, I was lucky enough to be able to come with. Be prepared for the beautiful pictures.

Arrived: Sat afternoon



Sunday: my family that lives in WI came up to visit. We went and visited Boulder Junction.










Monday

...it turned out to be a pretty special day for us, read about it in the next coming post....









Tuesday















Wed:

Thursday: Trav had an interview for school & afterwards stopped by my aunts and uncles place


Friday





baby eagle in the nest
the eagle is on the way top of the tree




Sat: went home, but made a stop to see friends of the family, and this have made an appearance many times:


.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!......